A Glimpse Of Fulfilment

Note: This was originally written as a fanfiction of Ayn Rand's We The Living. For readers not acquainted with the novel, think of it as original fiction, with Russian names, of course. :)

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“Because we often love the man whom we torment,

 You, you, now you, only it should be the luck of my soul

  Come, follow me in the wonderland,

 Your dark eyes shine by the night!”

The song continued to grow hypnotic and mesmerizing as a perfectly pitched voice sang as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Rising in rhythm, it seemed to blend with the surroundings – the heavy fragrance of newly bloomed flowers lingered in the air and the soft breeze was laden with the refreshing scent of water – all of it as if taking me into a trance. For a moment, I had forgotten that I stood on the shore of a sprawling lake which disappeared into thick woods all around,

The breathtaking scenery however did not match up to the intoxicating effect that the voice had, so taken I was with it.

…So much that I couldn’t look away from the vision of beauty that Kira Argounova was – who merely stood feet apart from where I was.

And I, Andrei Taganov, stood frozen at my place. To think that I would meet Kira again…unimaginable.

The song ceased and life returned to my senses. And yet it seemed as if I had been seamlessly merged into the environ that Kira had created. She stood tall and slender, gracefully draped in soft pastel shades of crepe that fluttered in the breeze. Her tousled brown hair fell on both sides of her delicate neck that was stretched like a swan’s, as if she was laughing, rejoicing in the eternal bliss of the universe – adding to a demeanor so alive and carefree. Her grey eyes were full of joy and masked beneath them was an everlasting understanding of life and its mysteries. The lit sky was beyond her, giving her an almost angelic appearance and the shifting shafts of sunlight that streamed through the overlying foliage made those very eyes…glimmer.

…She did not smile. Her lips were set in a firm and yet yielding line. She did not move – time seemed to stand still , if only to immortalize the magnificent splendor – gentle, elegant and giving – that stood in the form of Kira.

I couldn’t bring myself to speak. However, that was exactly what she wanted me to do.

I would have been content to simply gaze into her eyes and relive the memories, the only happy memories of my life that I had shared with her. But as my eyes met hers, the impending storm beneath the calm startled me out of my reverie.

She raised her head in a long-drawn, mocking laughter.

“Oh, Andrei…do you even realize why you’re here?”

I was taken aback. However, I chose not to show my surprise. “Kira, I…”

She raised her hand. “Don’t bother. We both know why we are here.”

‘Here’. What did it mean? We were not in Petrograd. Hell, we were not even ‘abroad’ – the mystical place which partly accounted for risking our lives

Then where were we?

To see Kira before me…the fact in itself…

“…Kira! You don’t, you certainly don’t mean…”

She looked away, whispering. “I wanted to meet Leo again.”

She looked at me as I slowly approached her. Placing my hands on her shoulders, I tried to be as gentle as possible. “It’s all right. One doesn’t give up on loving even when it is no longer requited.”

Her eyes closed, Kira murmured. “It never was. Oh, Andrei, I…I couldn’t see...”

I tenderly held her in my arms. “Loving you was enough in itself. I willingly chose to make the sacrifice.”

She did not move. Her stance rigid, her head against my shoulder. Tears had begun to flow but I withstood the fact that they were not for me.

They never will be.

The scene rapidly changed as the light changed it colors and Kira seemed to be fading from my hands. Her purpose here was fulfilled.

As the light enveloped me, I held on to Kira, before letting go.

I took but a moment to reflect. All that we had done, sacrificed…resulted in nothing.  I gave up my position in the Party, only so that Kira could be with that wretched Leo Kovalensky again. I loved her but she loved him. Was it worthwhile in the end: going to all extents, giving up our lives, dying in the unfulfilled hope of being loved?

I knew the answer to my question as well as I knew how Kira would answer.

“Kira…I always have, do and will love you…my highest reverence…”

A fading smile was all that I got in response.

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Another note: The opening lines are the translation of ‘Song of Broken Glass’ – Kira’s favourite song in the novel - which is actually an operetta called Die Bajadere by Hungarian composer Emmerich Kalman. Yes, I can go to such extents for being original. ^^"